I have two friends who read more than me. Often we like the same books and really enjoy recommending titles to each other, especially when we believe we’ve found a truly riveting page-turner. One friend recommended this book to our threesome with a comment that said something like “I can’t put this book down”. We immediately purchased the book but I didn’t start reading it right away. My other friend texted our group a few days later: “I can’t stop crying”. I thought to myself, “I need to get started.”
Only after I started did I realize I was reading a
book written by the mother of one of the Columbine High School murderers. I quickly wondered if this was a memoir I really wanted to spend my free time with. My high-schooler couldn’t wait for me to finish because I kept bothering him about it as I read the heart wrenching account of this guilt-ridden mom. I asked him lots of questions about bullying in high school, and if he knew people with suicidal thoughts, and which of his friends play violent video games, and if he knows ANY boys who actually keep a journal, etc. After all, my Troy is the same age as Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris were when they killed 13 people on 4/20/1999 at their high school. Disturbing.
It took me a LOT LONGER to finish this book than my two friends. Quite frankly, it was hard to put down but hard to pick up. In order to finish faster, I started listening on Audible when I needed my hands and eyes free to drive, balance my checkbook or cook dinner. Dylan’s mother is not only the author but also the narrator and I found this chilling.
As I was half way through I learned of the devastating deaths of the four sweet UGA female students last week. My brain was trying to reconcile the grief of those four mothers as compared to the grief of Sue Klebold and it’s just not the same thing so I found it impossible to reconcile and completely disturbing.
My two friends each rated this book 5 stars on Goodreads. I gave it 3. My rating is probably not fair. It is certainly well-written, hauntingly honest, and captivating without a doubt. I just had trouble stomaching it all. It’s sadder than sad but an excellent book.
